STCH Ministries Family Counseling is pleased to announce a new 13-week course to help parents excel at one of life’s hardest jobs. “Raising Highly Capable Kids” will begin Wednesday, September 12 at Grace Point Church Medical Campus in San Antonio, and the class will be led by Dosely Antongiorgi, regional counseling director for San Antonio.

The curriculum was developed by RezilientKidz in partnership with Search Institute. Their “40 Developmental Assets” include attributes such as honesty, integrity, parental involvement, self-esteem, and religious community. According to the publisher, these essential building blocks “not only help parents raise healthy, caring, and responsible children but also equip kids with the power to make healthy life choices.”

Parents who have graduated from the course are highly enthusiastic about their experience. “The classes helped me learn how to treat others; how to treat my wife and children better. And now I’m another person; a good person. My life has changed completely. It’s an excellent program.”

“It helped us to interact and communicate with our children better. It allowed us to understand about their homework needs, and it was really enjoyable to change our daily routine and have ‘parent time’ to talk with other parents.”

Our mission at STCH Ministries is to care for children and families, and one of the ways we do that is by coming alongside families before they get into crisis situations that are unrecoverable. This class will empower more San Antonio families for success!

This article highlights our counseling office in Castroville and was written by Ginger Carnes. It originally appeared in the FBC of Castroville “Connections Newsletter” in August 2018.

Is your marriage in crisis? Do you have a concern about one of your children or your spouse? Has your family been fractured and you need help moving on?

Your church has a convenient and economical counselor available to help. Counseling can help parents be better parents and can help children communicate with the parents. The counselors also help couples with problems in their marriage and those who are going through separation or divorce.

Through STCH Ministries, a South Texas affiliate of the Texas Baptists that originally was called South Texas Children’s Home, a Christ-centered counselor is available every Tuesday and meets with individuals, couples, and family members in an office in the Chapel building.

But isn’t there a stigma associated with people who need counseling? What if someone sees me going to meet with the counselor? You might say, “I’m not crazy, so why do I need to go to counseling?”

But Dosely Antongiorgi-Green, Regional Counseling Director for the San Antonio area, says, “First, I’m going to send you back to Christ. Second, the counselor is going to teach you some coping skills, so when you have a situation that you’re dealing with that’s going to be difficult, you’ll have a toolbox and you can pull out the tool you need and use it.”

The current counselor at First Baptist is Maritza Garcia-Pulido. She will meet with you every other Tuesday so she can serve more people. During those two weeks, you work on assignments so you can practice the methods – “tools” – she has provided for you.

“We encourage people to pray, to stay in the Word, to spend quiet time to help them understand where God is leading them,” Green said.

Although STCH Ministries does not turn away anyone who needs help, the organization does appreciate donations, large or small. To help you understand the value of this counseling, a counselor who does not accept insurance could charge up to $150 per session. STCH Ministries does not accept insurance or government funding “because we would like to remain Christ-centered in the delivery of our counseling services,” Green said.

Make appointments by calling the STCH Ministries office toll free at 1-833-83-STCHM. The church does not set up appointments or know who is receiving services. Counseling is available to members of the surrounding communities, too. As more people express a need, they could add another day to the counselor’s schedule.

You can read more about STCH Ministries at www.stchm.org.

This article was written by Karen Knowlton, Licensed Professional Counselor and Registered Play Therapist at STCH Ministries.

You would think that this title is an oxymoron, but I will explain this title as I go on with my story. Grief Share was introduced to me about two years ago. I had to participate in order to lead a group through the course. During that time, I was able to deal with some of my own unresolved grief. I had lost my Mom, my Dad, and then my brother-in-law that I had known since I was about eight years old. He became family when I was about eleven.

Going into this group I did not think that I had unresolved grief. I quickly discovered I could not deny my feelings. That group was the beginning of my grief journey. I didn’t start out my counseling career thinking I would focus on grief! As I sat there I thought to myself, more people need to be able to find the relief I did through this program.

Here are three stories from the Grief Share groups that I have led. This program has now served people from numerous communities in South Texas.

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DORIS*

Doris joined Grief Share 14 days after her husband passed away from cancer. Doris was angry. Doris was very angry. The people in the group poured love into Doris every time she would lash out her anger at God, at the doctors, and at the hospital. Several told her that she may not be ready for Grief Share, but Doris insisted on staying and made every session. At the end of the Grief Share experience, Doris was mildly better and had her anger somewhat under control.

Doris came to the next round of Grief Share and during this time she was amazed that she did not remember seeing the videos or remember many of the discussions.  She was saved when she was young but had strayed from her relationship with Christ. Through Grief Share, her relationship grew deeper as Christ began healing. Doris was finally beginning to deal with the death of her husband. During this group she gave the testimony that if it weren’t for the previous Grief Share group she probably would have wrapped her car around a tree to end her misery. But, she wanted to come back to Grief Share and tell us that we were wrong and she was right in her anger! Doris admitted at the end of the second round of Grief Share that she was the one that was wrong and that she still needed help in dealing with her feelings of grief. She needed to learn how to move forward with her life, as she has a thriving business to continue to run and her only son had kept it afloat during this time.

Doris returned for the third round of Grief Share and was open to learning and sharing and helping others in the group deal with their feelings and anger. Doris just completed her third round of Grief Share and stated that if it wasn’t for Grief Share she wouldn’t be able to function in life.

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MONA & JENNY*

Mona & Jenny are sister-in-laws who had both lost their husbands within a year of each other. One lost hers to a long illness, while the other discovered her husband in the fields where he was working, dead from a heart attack.

Mona was suffering from severe anxiety and could not drive without becoming hysterical. Jenny would drive her sister-in-law places and check on her, and then her own husband died unexpectedly, leaving the two women to depend on each other and God. The pastor of their church had heard about Grief Share in Beeville and suggested they contact FBC Beeville to find out about classes. They showed up during the 6^th session and fit right into the group.

After a few weeks Jenny related a story about having trouble with her children and processing all the legal ends of the death. One day after a particularly arduous day, she was driving home and pulled over to the edge of the highway. She pulled a gun out of the glove compartment that she always kept there and sat for two hours contemplating using that gun. Jenny felt as though she lost her husband and now was losing the relationship with her daughter and life just felt too hard to live anymore. She remembered her dog that she got when her husband died to help keep guard of their place in the country and wondered who would take care of her dog. She placed the gun back in the glove compartment and continued home that evening. Jenny stated that Grief Share has shown her ways to deal with her feelings, shown her that there is still purpose in her life.  She is now active at her church.

Mona testified at the end of the 14th session that she was finally able to drive in the daytime and had begun volunteering to help keep her mind off of her problems. She continues to be active in her church as well.

Both ladies now feel that they are ready to face their lives without their husbands, knowing that God isn’t finished with them yet. They say they are still lonely but have dealt with the underlying anger of being left behind by their spouses.

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DESTINY*

Destiny came in on week 7 of the group. She had lost her mother nine months previously and her husband three months earlier. Destiny was feeling lost and lonely and was angry that she was alone. Destiny committed to Grief Share and opened up each time, sharing through tears of all the things that she was experiencing not having her husband to come home to every night. She talked through her feelings each week, with the other ladies sharing their similar feelings, and began her process of healing.

Destiny came to the celebration of Grief Share ending and stated that she had a story to tell us. She shared that before she came to Grief Share that she sat on the side of the bed one night with a gun in one hand and a bottle of pills in the other, trying to decide which was the best route to take to end her misery. Destiny was a dedicated Christian, and knew that this was not the right answer, but she was so lonely she couldn’t see going on any longer. She finally went to sleep and the next morning called the hospice group that had handled her husband’s case and they referred her to our Grief Share group. Little did any of us know that Destiny was that close to ending it all, and that our group was her last reach to God for help in her situation.

Destiny plans to return to our next session of Grief Share to continue her journey of healing.

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* Names have been changed to maintain confidentiality.

I share these stories with you to tell you that I have learned two things:

1. Grief is every bit as life threatening as cancer and if left unresolved it can destroy a person.  Anger plays a huge part of grief.  Anger also destroys relationships.  Depression is also a part of grief and has a negative impact on the person who is grieving.

2.  Obeying God’s lead is so important.  When God plants that desire in your heart to do something, whether it is teaching a Sunday school class or volunteering for VBS or whatever the case may be, God has a plan and a purpose that is beyond your knowledge and following Him could save someone’s life.

The first time it was shared with me that one of these ladies almost chose death over life and gave credit to Grief Share and my leading the class, I took it with a grain of salt and thought it was coincidental. But God has always known that I require more confirmation than a one-time story.  He has allowed me to hear story after story.

Last night when I heard Destiny’s story, I shared it with my husband and I just broke into tears as he told me it was due to my obedience to Christ that these women are looking to me, trusting me, and listening to God again.  It was such a moving realization of the impact we have on people when we follow God’s lead and are obedient to His will.

Trust me, after working a full day in counseling and then adding three more hours in the evening, I have thought I’m not doing this again, but if you noticed, two of three of these cases came into group mid-way and needed to go through the course again.  Knowing that kept me going.

I feel so blessed by hearing, and finally believing after last night, that maybe I did make a difference in someone’s life today.  And that my friend is where I find that grief brings joy!

To find out more about Grief Share, contact STCH Ministries Family Counseling at 1.833.83.STCHM.

“My goodness, how you have grown!” How many times have we said those words to others whom we knew yesterday as small children? Days melded into months and years so quickly, and it seems overnight that the child has become a young adult. We have experienced similar moments with our sponsored Samuel’s Fund children, especially during the mission trips this summer.

It seems only a short time ago that we carried food and resources to the home of a Samuel’s Fund child. How their eyes widened and glowed at the sight of bread and milk, and special treats like peanut butter and cookies! Now some of these same children, grown into young adults, have joined our mission teams as translators. They assist in delivering food and resources to other sponsored children and their families and help with construction projects, orphanage ministry, and VBS classes.

Recently we asked Harold to share his testimony with a missions group. He is married to Sara, a lovely Christian girl, and works for Fed Ex. He expressed his gratitude for the sponsorship that paid for his schooling and allowed him to learn English. Today he is a leader in the IBQ church and pastors another “daughter” church during his off time.

“Samuel’s Fund sponsorship enabled me to get an education and learn English. That is the reason that today I have a good job and can support my family and my church,” he says.

Harold is just one of many examples of the impact of the Samuel’s Fund sponsorship program. It is an investment in the future of churches and families in the Dominican Republic.

Julie Strayer has a passion for teaching money management, and she can’t imagine not doing so.

As a volunteer teacher for STCH Ministries Faith & Finances, Julie helps individuals, couples, and entire families learn how to make a spending plan, manage debt and loans, live more simply, and set goals for saving.

“Faith and Finances is the best title in the world to me,” Julie explained, “because I’m sold out on people getting their finances in order and I’m sold out on faith.”

“Julie Strayer is one of the most passionate and high energy volunteers we have ever met!” said Jimmy Rodriguez, Director of Faith & Finances in Corpus Christi. “She is a busy and successful businesswoman who finds time to follow her calling to help others, and she also recruits business colleagues and fellow church members to help out.”

Julie’s conviction that wise money management is the key to a successful life runs deep. She and her husband Stewart both grew up in homes that modeled how to spend and save wisely. Their habit of always setting aside reserves enabled them to survive three-month stretches without a paycheck as they built a small business and raised their family.

It stirs Julie’s heart to hear students’ stories about the consequences of poor money management.

“One sad situation is people taking out payday loans to hold them over until their next paycheck,” Julie shared. “God says the borrower is slave to the lender, and these six-month payday loans are charging 60 to 70 percent interest! We’ve got to do something to help people overcome the obstacles that keep them trapped. Faith & Finances classes are a beginning.”

“I love that you don’t have to be brilliant to learn about personal finance,” Julie continued. “You can be normal and average and become financially secure. Managing finances is a basic life skill you have to learn, just like driving a car. It burdens me that people aren’t learning it. The world is broken, and it encourages us to be broke…to spend every penny we have. When you are financially broke, it is easy to get beaten down. Before long, every aspect of your life gets broken. But, when a person is willing to look at their finances and begin getting them in order, other areas of their life start falling into place. I truly believe that!”

STCH Ministries is grateful for volunteers like Julie who serve others through the things they are passionate about. What is your passion? To learn how you can serve, visitwww.STCHM.org/Ways-to-Help.