Tabitha’s Smile

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Tabitha, 55, reached the point where she entertained the idea of ending it all – believing there was no way out of the mess she had made of her life.  She came to counseling stricken with guilt, grief and hopelessness.

Her upbringing in an unstable home spilled over into her own marriage and family. She had traveled a long hard road suffering tremendous emotional and physical abuse throughout her life and also in her first marriage. She felt unworthy, unloved and unfit to be a mother to her 3 children.

These overwhelming feelings led her to make a decision that haunted her for years to come. Tabitha decided to leave her family believing she wasn’t enough for them, for God, for anyone.

God had a plan of redemption for Tabitha. God led her to STCH Ministries Family Counseling Corpus Christi, where she met someone who listened, who cared and believed that she was a worthy person. STCH Ministries counselor Leslee O’Neal became the representation of God’s grace for Tabitha. Through the course of counseling, Leslee helped Tabitha learn about her true identity in Christ.

Leslee stood firm in the truth of God’s good plan for Tabitha’s life. This helped her gain an understanding of God’s love, mercy and grace. Tabitha worked hard to battle the lies of her past and hold fast to the truth of God’s love, salvation and redemptive plan for her life. God and Tabitha won. She learned to accept herself, forgive others, and be led by a God of unconditional love and acceptance. As she healed, she reconnected with her grown children and enjoyed the blessing of being a part of her grandchildren’s lives.

Tabitha recently wrote a sweet note to Leslee staking her claim to the freedom and blessings she now gets to live in. Tabitha shares in her message “… I love my life…and I know that God and you did an amazing thing for me, you taught me to smile again.”

Leslee gives thanks to God for His unconditional love and peace. She is grateful to STCH Ministries donors, supporters and staff for providing the opportunity to help Tabitha find her smile again.

Overflowing into-your-lap Blessings

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We all know Jesus’ words about giving and receiving, right? “Give and you will receive.” He elaborated on the receiving part, “in full—pressed down, shaken together to make room for more, running over, and poured into your lap.” As if this wasn’t incentive enough, Jesus goes on to hammer His point by adding, “The amount you give will determine the amount you get back!” (NLT)

A mission trip experience repeatedly lives out this truth, “I came to give, but I received so much more!”

The recent experiences of two men’s groups met a significant need for our International ministry. Every year our summer mission teams tackle some big projects and accomplish amazing projects in a short week-long mission trip. But after the last, “Adios. Dios te bendiga,” as they board the flight home, Russell faces a daunting list—finishing, painting, installing, delivering, disposing.

We prayed, and before we could advertise, God answered with not one but two groups of men with the desire to do construction, who each came for a week Cypress FBC and WUBC-Crosspoint. They came to give but experienced “overflowing into your lap” blessings.

Some of the construction tasks included building 15 shelving units for the Higuey orphanage, attaching them to the walls. The home of a Samuel’s Fund child needed interior walls, and siding. At another home two corners of the roof needed to be installed, the siding completed and walls varnished. At Hatillo, they finished roofing the new gazebo and other tasks.

But the overflowing blessings were the personal ones experienced by the men on both teams. As Russell reported, “It is quite hard to verbalize what happens in the life of people when on a mission trip.”

Russell shared about what he referred to as not a coincidence, but a God-incidence. God brought one man from Florida to join the Houston team. He shared about his troubled son with another man. Only to discover that this man had walked a similar destructive path in his youth and could now witness about how God had forgiven and transformed the ashes into the beauty of a life with purpose.

One pastor shared, “My desire and vision for the trip was to take a small group of men to work side-by-side in a mission setting, with the prayer that Jesus would change their perspectives. In turn, their life priorities and practices would be changed as well. Through our experience with STCH Ministries, that is exactly what the Lord did. They came back loving Jesus at a deeper level. Our lives will never be the same! Since returning home, some of the guys have sponsored kids through the Samuels Fund, have made adjustments in their personal lives and priorities, and have sought Jesus more deeply.

Excellence, new vision, life transformation—these goals far surpass any medical clinic, children’s ministry or construction project we may accomplish. Every team sacrifices money, time, resources. We trust God to pour into each person rich blessings, “overflowing into their laps” as a result. We give the glory to God when he uses a STCH Ministries International mission trip to realize these eternal goals.

Date Night by the Bay

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Date Night by the Bay “made all the difference in the world for our marriage,” declared one couple.

The couple joined more than 70 other couples on September 20th, at the Omni Hotel. STCH Ministries Family Counseling in Corpus Christi has offered marriage and family seminars to the public for 10 years. The speaker’s Christ-centered message and the opportunity to enjoy a romantic night created a special evening.

This year’s event featured an amazing jazz band, The Kris Redus Quartet. They played romantic smooth jazz as attendees entered the room. Husbands received a red rose to gift to their wife and wives accepted a fill-in-the-blank coupon to offer their husbands. Couples found their way to a quiet table for two where they mingled and awaited the speaker.

The lovely emcee, Leslee O’Neal, took the stage to introduce the speaker, Ken de Koning. Ken, the pastor of Waldron Road Baptist Church, talked about unraveling the mystery of intimacy in a very practical and understandable way. He added real-life examples and stressed the importance of expressing kindness toward each other. As dinner was served, Ken took a break and couples enjoyed jazz music, a delicious meal and some intimate conversation.

During breaks, couples received date night baskets and gifts through random ticket drawings. As the evening progressed, couples snuggled close and continued to listen to Ken’s words of wisdom.

Attendees enjoyed the event, evidenced by the positive comments. The romantic elements, intimate details and beautiful surroundings created the right atmosphere for a meaningful event. Attendees appreciated Ken’s personal stories and practical aspects of intimacy in marriage.

The lady who cherished the dramatic turnaround in her marriage explained she and her husband had been having serious issues for several months and as a couple; they were not in a good place.  Throughout the evening, the things Ken said started “clicking” and every single word impacted their thinking.  She said “by the end, it was perfect” and since that evening they both have been applying what they learned to restore the intimacy they once enjoyed.

Each couple left with more than just a nice meal, they received an evening to remember and lessons for a lifetime.

No Longer Bound

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Julia, a new resident at STCH Ministries Homes for Families (HFF), moved to Marshall Ranch determined to commit her heart to Jesus and to give her infant daughter Jordan a good life. After ending a bad relationship, she knew the time had come to break the abusive pattern. HFF allows mothers and their children to live in a safe, comfortable home setting as supportive staff help address the physical, emotional and spiritual needs of the family.

There are four phases in the program: Phase I – The Restorative, Phase II – The Equipping, Phase III – The Launch, Phase IV – The Landing. Inspiration for the phase names comes from the book Streams in the Desert by L.B. Cowman, “Jesus Christ is not my security against the storms of life, but He is my perfect security in the storms. He has never promised me an easy passage, only a safe landing.”

Julia experienced tremendous trauma during her formative years. Her dad hung himself when she was five years old and in the aftermath, she grew up in a controlling environment with her mother and a string of boyfriends. During this restorative phase at HFF, Julia recognized the hurt she experienced as a child resulted in her repeating the same manipulative habits as her mom. “I had to go through a forgiveness process which was possible only through Christ to overcome the guilt of the choices I have made,” She admitted.

Julia asked God to remind her of a time when she was not manipulative. He took her back to the age of seven when she had a nanny, Zonia, who served Jesus and taught Julia the scriptures. Her life, at that time, was devoted to pleasing Jesus. Julia hoped to become, for her baby, the same example Zonia had been to her. To do so, she knew she needed Jesus.

Encouraged by that memory, Julia continues to grow and seek God’s face. She is learning how to break free from the bondage that taught her to look to people instead of to the Lord. She describes the best part of living at HFF as the opportunity to show Jordan what it means to know who she is in Christ. The chance to live on Marshall Ranch with no distraction allows Julia to learn how to keep negative experiences from taking root in her heart.

It is beautiful to see what Jesus is doing through His word, prayer, praise and worship in her life and the other women at STCH Ministries Homes for Families.

In Permanent Ink

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Desirae, a STCH Ministries Family Counselor in Corpus Christi recently experienced God’s encouragement when He used her to make a difference in a young lady’s life. This client, a high school senior, struggled with low self-esteem, eating problems, getting along with her mom, anxiety and family adjustments. Desirae worked with her throughout the school year with a focus on Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) to help her understand and change any irrational thinking patterns she had developed.

This client struggled with a thinking pattern known as emotional reasoning. Sometimes identified as “Feelings as Facts,” this distortion causes the belief if you feel something it must be true. She often thought, “I feel ugly, so I must be ugly.” Desirae taught her about the cognitive triangle, a diagram explaining how thought, emotions and behaviors are all interconnected. In this example, the thought that she must be ugly led to the emotion of disgust. Feeling disgusting led to the action of isolating herself from hanging out with friends or going on a date. Desirae helped the girl to alter her thoughts using the triangle. They replaced the original thought with “Nobody is perfect, not even Instagram models. I have good qualities.” These new thoughts brought a new emotion, feeling worthy, which led to her new action of hanging out with friends.

Although they can see the progress clients make over time, counselors may not always realize how deeply visuals, such as the cognitive triangle, affect their clients. The week after graduation, Desirae received a welcome affirmation; the client showed her a tattoo of a small triangle on her ring finger. The tattoo serves as a permanent reminder of the powerful impact the visual has on her thinking. It helps remind her as she goes off to college in San Antonio that her thoughts, feelings and actions intertwine.

Completing treatment with this client gave Desirae a great feeling of accomplishment. She shares, “This is one of those moments where I understood the importance of encouraging someone to find a passion that not only changes the way they think but the way the world thinks.”

STCH Ministries Family Counselors serve on the frontlines to carry out the mission of healing hearts and sharing hope every day. God, in His goodness, weaves together motivation for each individual through the process. Desirae enjoyed the privilege of sharing in a journey to self-discovery and acceptance and the client now has a story to tell others when they ask her about the triangle.

For information about a STCH Ministries Family Counseling location near you: https://www.stchm.org/family-counseling/family-counseling-locations/

Ladies for the Least

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STCH Ministries Ladies for the Least (LFTL), a generous group dedicated to impacting children and families in need, held their annual luncheon at the Junior League of Houston. The elegant affair raised resources for a special project benefitting those helped through the nine services of STCH Ministries. LFTL began over five years ago.

This year’s program created a “behind the scenes” peek into the lives of individuals who have experienced the benefits of STCH Ministries first-hand. Personal testimonies fascinated the crowd as they spoke about the impact STCH Ministries made on their lives. A housemom at Homes for Children (HFC), a young woman moving through the Homes for Families (HFF) program and a college student from HFC shared their stories. LFTL members voted this year to fund the Sports Recreation Equipment Project at Homes for Families.

The members of LFTL enjoyed a vibrant sense of community. One member, Joy Kotal, has experienced this community on a deeply personal level. Joy lived as a resident at Homes for Children for eleven months in the mid-1960s. Shortly after she arrived, Jenny Broughton also moved to the home now called Dimmick Cottage. The two girls quickly grew to feel like family and remained in touch over the years. The first LFTL luncheon took place at HFC and Jenny came back to Boothe Campus as the keynote speaker. She asked Joy accompany her as her guest for the weekend. Although the two had stayed in touch, twenty years had passed since they had seen one another. “I was pinching myself because it was just the two of us, we got to catch up quite a bit,” Joy remembers.

Also that weekend, Joy met housemom Virginia Wilkins during the tour of Boothe Campus. Over time as Joy visited the campus for both personal and service project trips, the two ladies built a close friendship. Joy expressed that hearing the testimony of one of her “favorite people” this year pleased her greatly.

Sisters Lorraine Ross and Kay Walleck from East Bernard also attended the first luncheon. As women do, the two struck up a conversation with Joy in the ladies’ room. Joy shared with them how she intentionally tries to share Jesus’ love in her everyday life – praying for opportunities to minister to ladies she meets at social functions. Joy told them. “I pray for discernment – that I’ll know whether someone needs a hug or an offer of prayer or a kind word.” Joy’s intentionality resonated with the sisters and Lorraine said she never forgot that conversation and determined to adopt the habit herself. The three ladies sat together this year and enjoyed the opportunity to renew their acquaintance.

Lorraine and Kay have attended almost all LFTL Luncheons, but their fondness for STCH Ministries surpasses monetary donations. A young lady came to the sisters for help in 2015 and they introduced her to the Homes for Families (HFF) program. HFF is a resource for single mothers and their children designed to bring them through a time of crisis while transitioning into independent living. The young lady completed the HFF program in 2018.

When asked about the luncheon this year, Lorraine and Kay expressed their delight with the event. Lorraine shared it was particularly poignant, “We were able to bring as our guest a young lady who graduated from the HFF program. It was so special to see her visiting with those people who had so much to do with her getting stronger and learning how to be a good mom. I love Ladies for the Least!” Kay enjoyed the personal feel of the presentations. “I loved being able to hear the personal testimonies of hope and healing,” she stated. “The stories brought to life what STCH Ministries stands for. Ladies for the Least is always such an enjoyable experience.”

If you would like to enjoy the comradery of the Ladies for the Least mark your calendars now for Saturday, April 4, 2020. Plans are underway for the 2020 LFTL event which will be in San Antonio. We will announce more details as the date draws closer.

A Conference For People Who Help People

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Professionals on the front lines of caring for others were all represented at STCH Ministries’ 3rd annual iCare Conference this month in Victoria, Texas. Emergency first responders, pastors, teachers, counselors and politicians all battle the epidemic that is the mental health crisis facing our homes, schools, churches and communities around the country. STCH Ministries Family Counseling provided a resource to equip those who work with the public for their tasks. iCare, a conference for people who help people once again provided quality training for those who work in the industry. care

Coming from all across South Texas, over 200 participants, staff and presenters gathered at the University of Houston-Victoria to explore topics ranging from Understanding and Preventing Suicide to overcoming professional burn out to instruction on parenting and marriage. Glen Dry, Lead Pastor of The Sportsman’s Church in Victoria brought most of his staff with him to the event. “I think what is learned and shared here is some of the most valuable education in the business of caring for others,” Dry explained in answer to what kept him coming back for his third iCare Conference.

Experts from across STCH Ministries’ nine ministries in cooperation with area churches and organizations came together to provide attendees with training and resources applicable to their individual practices. iCare is the only conference of its kind in Victoria offering continuing education units for licensed professionals as well as practical material applicable to laypeople serving in leadership capacities in their communities.

Lunchtime provided the highlight for many in the form of self-care through laughter. Melissa Radke made attendees laugh through tears with the story of how she came to believe in her own self-worth after years of doubt. The thirty breakout sessions explored heavy subject matter, and levity in the middle of the day provided the opportunity to relax and gear up for more learning in the afternoon.

Mental health is a broad topic on everyone’s mind. The seemingly unpredictable, often tragic impact an individual’s suffering contributes to the unease throughout the nation today and affects everyone in some capacity. STCH Ministries continues to raise the bar of quality care for families and children in crisis as well as leading others to do the same.

Dollars and Sense

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Each summer, Homes for Children junior high and high school students gain a sense of purpose and a paycheck through the Vocational Training Program (VTP). For two weeks, our students take part in a working environment where they learn how to apply for a position, learn how to work under a supervisor, learn new skills and learn how to work with their peers.

Participating staff members demonstrate appropriate supervisory skills, problem-solving, communication and servant leadership to the students. Caseworkers and houseparents use the students’ participation in the VTP to begin conversations about financial integrity, budgeting and stewardship. Other staff supervisors enjoy developing a personal relationship with students, something their typical workday seldom allows. Mason Elliot in the Maintenance Department, who taught the students about lawn care said, “Supervising the VTP program allowed me to build deeper relationships with the kids and it was fun to teach them new things.”

One new participant, working in the Maintenance Department, got a crash course in plumbing the first week and spent the second-week trimming trees. She discovered how much she likes working outside and is hopeful she can continue on a volunteer basis.

For the past three summers, another student has worked in the Student Activities department during the VTP, which includes working with the younger children on campus. He believes the key to success with elementary children is to love them as if they were his own family.  “I’m more than sure that God is working on me through this program,” he stated. His tremendous smile is proof that the VTP is helping him to develop ideas about what he wants to do as a career. He is not yet sure what path he will follow after high school, but he knows God will use him to impact kids’ lives through whatever profession he chooses.

This year, about 30 students worked in six different departments on Boothe Campus during the VTP. Most of the students plan to save the money they earned for big purchases. Learning to save and budget their dollars makes sense for future success and are life skills we try to teach each of the students. The program is great for both staff and students and they look forward to it every year.

Llego La Luz

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Frequent blackouts in the Dominican Republic plummet whole neighborhoods into darkness—blacker than a hundred midnights.* They light candles and continue their activities without a hiccup.  When the lights are suddenly restored, a joyous cry echoes from house to house. “Llego la luz!”  The light has come!

The Figueroa family represents a composite of many families in which the LIGHT has transformed their lives.  The three children attended a VBS class held by a mission team. They accepted Christ. A small candle of hope glimmered. A medical team met physical needs and counseled for spiritual needs. Mom glimpsed an answer to the darkness and chaos of their alcoholic family.

Other teams visited the Figueroa family and shared an evening meal and the love of Christ. Eventually, the children were sponsored through Samuel’s Fund. Teams shared groceries from the Texas Baptist Hunger Offering. Mom accepted Christ. The LIGHT grew.

Dad continued to drink constantly. Teams and church members continue to visit. More discipleship. More VBS. The LIGHT could not be restrained. Hallelujah time! Dad accepts Christ. Mom and Dad’s marriage is restored.

Now the LIGHT is blazing out of that home and family into the entire neighborhood. “I want what you have,” neighbors and family declare. Eventually, other teams rebuild their home. Today, their family of five shares the LIGHT of the Gospel message into countless other homes.

How many teams invested in that family? How long did it take?  Possibly 8-9 teams, over a four-year period, plus the donations from many more, and the sponsors of the children. Is it worth it?  Wouldn’t the time be better spent sharing 500 tracts and testimonies door-to-door? Possibly. How much time and effort did Jesus invest during his short time on earth to disciple only 12?   They began a multiplication process that has extended throughout the world and continues into each of our lives.

This summer 22 churches and over 369 participants ministered in the Dominican Republic and in Costa Rica. 127 made a decision to open their hearts to the LIGHT! The teams also discipled, taught, and met many needs of children and families. With one heart they shared life-transforming LIGHT.

In Costa Rica, Kenedy/Kerrville teamed up to do maintenance at an orphanage in San Jose and then traveled into the interior to minister to Nicaraguan refugees trapped in desperate poverty.

In late June, Bear Creek team was joined by FBC San Antonio and FBC Kenedy. Their ministry activities included building on the Higuey orphanage, VBS, sports camp, a ladies Bible study, preaching and teaching.

University Baptist church flew into Santiago for the 5th year.  They built a playground for orphanage children and Trauma Competent Caregiving to the staff.

FBC Corpus Christi and Parkway Victoria joined together to bless the school at Guaricanos with bookshelves for the library and a VBS, in addition to a pastor’s conference, marriage seminar and youth activities.

WUBC-Crosspoint brought a record 60+ team members.  Construction on the orphanage and the home of a Samuel’s Fund child, sports camp, medical clinic and ESL and VBS classes kept them especially busy.

Crossroads Baptist teachers team held training workshops in La Romana, in addition to IBQ.  They overlapped with FBC Beeville, Emmanuel, and Bay City as they worked in Hatillo.

“Go into all the world,” commanded Jesus just before He returned to His Father.  Sharing the LIGHT of the Gospel is essential.  What about the rest of the commandment?  “Make disciples… teaching them to observe all things I have commanded.” Teams who return annually and continue to pour into Dominican and Costa Rican ministries can truly fulfill Jesus’ Kingdom-building commandment.

*James Weldon Johnson, poet

Family, Faith & Finances

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Family, education, community service and participation in their local church have helped guide the Rosales family of San Antonio through life. Recently, Eva Rosales saw a flyer at her YMCA for a STCH Ministries Faith & Finances (FF) class. The idea that the Bible had something to say about her finances intrigued her. Her aunt, Maria Rosales, and daughter, Marriah Miranda, were also excited when she mentioned the class to them. Although the three ladies are in different stages of life, the opportunity to learn together in the study appealed to them.

Faith & Finances is a life skills training based on Biblical principles for money management. The topics include spending plans, managing debt, setting savings goals and preparing for the future.

Maria retired twenty-eight years ago and has enjoyed a comfortable retirement. Coming from a family with a history of longevity, she realized she needed to start thinking about the future. She came to FF wanting to learn how best to manage her money and better prepare for her future.

Eva is a widow with two adult children and works as a public elementary school teacher. She works a second, part-time job to help pay for her youngest son’s college tuition. Her personal faith and the importance of giving back to her community are two values she incorporates into her lessons. Eva hopes to retire in ten years but plans to remodel her family home before that happens. Her goal was to put together a workable savings plan to help her retire well.

Marriah Miranda graduated from Texas A&M University-Corpus Christi with a degree in Biomedical Science and a minor in Spanish. She plans to continue her education to become a Physician Assistant. “I wanted to take this course because, in school, you don’t learn about the basic stuff like taxes or anything financial.” Marriah has student loans and wanted to learn how to be able to pay it off and keep herself from taking on more debt.

The ladies enjoyed the variety of participants in their Faith & Finances sessions. Each session began and ended with prayer, specifically praying for one another. Comradery developed as individuals showed vulnerability by discussing personal situations and sharing tips to overcome specific fiscal obstacles. Maria recalls, “Not only was the teacher teaching us but we learned from our peers too.”  

Eva was grateful for their facilitator, Blanca Eschbach. Blanca is the Site Coordinator for the San Antonio Faith & Finances – Faith & Work regional office. “It was a neat part of the class to not have someone just dictating to you. Blanca told us what she learned through the mistakes she made. She helped us figure out how to fix our mistakes and learn from them.”

Today, they are better prepared to handle their money. Paying in cash is Maria’s biggest takeaway from the study. She closed several credit card accounts and has become more deliberate about her spending. Through the training, she learned how to rearrange her assets and save money. She has a new financial plan and does not worry about becoming a burden on her beloved family.

Eva is applying the principle of writing down all her expenses. She was surprised to realize how much money she spent eating out. “Those fast food offers are tempting to a busy working mom,” she explains. Dedication to being more intentional about her spending enables her to decide to eat at home.

Marriah is more aware of her spending habits. “Using cash makes a difference,” she describes. “I don’t want to buy things because I can see the money leaving.” Marriah and Eva started looking at discount stores and resale sites rather than making impulse purchases, and it is something they enjoy doing together. Marriah is determined to pay off her credit card and student debt.

“This is our simple life,” Maria declares. The Faith & Finances course has given them tools they will continue to use to build their family’s financial future for generations to come.